a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
I have a busted ear drum from when he honked his horn when we started to have sex on his car in the parking lot...
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Imagine cans of beer raining. Like not hitting you and hurting you. Just gently falling into your hand whenever you're sad
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
I just spent 5 minutes saying how beautiful you are and you come back with dont get fat cause you have weird nipples.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
I just puked on a sprinkler…Motherfucker tried to spray me
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