I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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