Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
That moment when you’re at the doctor to give a sperm sample you’re only getting 3G so the porn is buffering
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