Pls tell me she didnt actually sign a nutsack.
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
A true measure of a good friend is how long she responds to her friends drunken illogical texts. Youre a champ.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I am officially in a love triangle with my celebrity crush
Good News: There was a condom on the floor. Bad News: It was still in the wrapper
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
Randomize
