okay pat passed out under dana's car
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Randomize
