were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
In the wise words of Scar: "be prepared."
Do you think Scar was a Boy Scout?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Why is there bacon in the couch?
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
On a scale of one to 10 how Risky is it to sleep with a married man (all morals set aside)
Randomize
