dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
OK...I gotta go get strawberry short cake cakes and knee pads
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
I caught him with his head in the spinach bag this morning. He was laughing demonically saying, "i love spinach, yes I do."
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Downloaded the Pocket Penguin app. There are now penguins living in my phone. Technology is wonderful.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
Randomize