is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
So like, boobs.
are you really going to start every conversation like that?
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
Randomize
