He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
How do the people at CVS not know your living in their bathroom?
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
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and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
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I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
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