JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
