Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
How much more is Amanda Bynes going to rip out our hearts?!?!?
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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