I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I mean, I let him sleep with me after we both ate taco bell sober... That's kinda like love, right?
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize
