No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i feel like my eyelids need a kick stand.
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
two words...techno handjob
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
Sorry for rubbing my feet on you and repeating "good pony, stay."
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I witness him finger a girl behind the dj decks yet I'm still going to meet up with him. Wtf is my life
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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