I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Either your mom needs to stop making spagetti or we need to lay off the anal. I cant tell you how much im in pain.
Spagetti cuz im not giving up the other one.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
We had a 30 min conversation last night about whether or not to bone that girl with a lisp to see if she moans with one...
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Jimmy johns delivers to the bar behind work. Happy vodka day!
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
