Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
Randomize
