He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
My whole sorority girl exterior is just a lie. I'm a fat tumblr girl on the inside.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
When you're as high as I am right now brushing your teeth is both magical and fucking terrifying
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
