There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Of course I'll be there. I never miss an opportunity to smell like cigarettes, cheap beer, and shame.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
