I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
paul mccartney is starting to look like angela lansbury
There was a gorilla playing an accordion outside of my last final. I miss college already.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
He challenged me to a drink off, I couldn't just say no. It was a matter of pride really.
And as he was cursing your name from the bathroom you were ordering yourself another drink on his tab. The poor bastard had no clue you were a pro drunk
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I don't want my vagina anymore.
He fell asleep during FOREPLAY. Sober!!!
Im outta here as soon as my phone charges wtf
Randomize
