fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
There is literally a guy in my class with a gallon of water and a trophy.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
turns out it took a Belgian couchsurfer dressed as Heisenberg to rock my world.
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
I told him you're making deviled eggs for the party. Sisters make deviled eggs to get their sisters laid. It's science.
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
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