Taylor Swift is so right about you.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
