I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
Contrary to what I yelled at them last night, it turns out campus police CAN arrest people...
best line ever after sex today..."wow, that was a porn-star sized load"
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
i mean i'm drinking free wine with lesbians and listening to sinead oconnor so i'm not sure who won that breakup
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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