plz talk dirty to me
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
