it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
Is adulthood just morning sex and then walking through the grocery store 20 min later looking for something to take to work for lunch?
...and then running into your dad at said grocery store...
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Look, I need your help, not your judgment.
Randomize