Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The smoke alarm went off as soon as we opened the closet.
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
Your shirt... Was in my pants
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
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