Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
just saw a DUI checkpoint outside of a taco bell...i feel like thats cheating...
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
I just added a bunch of arbitrary options to my ouija board. Ghosts can now tell me "cheddar," "the homosexual agenda," "the whole foods vegan aisle," or "viable offspring"
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Randomize
