he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
I miss him.. What the hell did I get myself in to? I guess it will get better with time.
No. Just liquor. Time's no good.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I held the blackjack dealer's hand and told the old asian woman she was 'soft to the touch, but cold as ice"
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
