He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
really keith? you showed me your dick and your not gonna text me back
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
We fucked in my trunk while on the clock....what did you do at work today?
They were swingers. Real swingers. Thought it was going to be awesome until some fat guy tried to put my dick in his mouth.
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
He made a deal with his real estate agent called fucking in 50 properties for sale
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
