if you dont talk to me in person you cant text me
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
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