.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
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