Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
A university police officer just hhigh fived me when i drunkenly stumbled into Aderhold. Fucking 5 o'clock somewhere.ITS IN CASABLANCA RIGHT NOW! TIME ZONES!
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Randomize