I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
doesn't matter. i just recorded the power rangers theme song on my phone. and its loud. was thinking we could use it as our entrance song as we walk into bars.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
He wore pink swim trunks on our date and repeatedly insulted my profession, but his cat kept standing up like a person to nuzzle my face and I felt like a Disney Princess. I hate this dude, but the cat is too amazing for me to not fake interest for.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
