Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
There is only one good excuse for how sore I am right now. And that is incredibly acrobatic sex. Unfortunately for me that is not my excuse.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I'm taking a shower and i'm gonna bring my pocketknife with me
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
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