Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
Your vagain smells worse when im sober.
sorry, worng number
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
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