he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Registered sex offender is the model in class today.... There are too many things wrong with him getting naked in front of a lot of college students.
Hurricane Sex Time is the only thing iv said since it started.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
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