Sponge bath it is.
I had a long pep-talk with my penis that ended in "I love you, I'll try harder and I'm sorry."
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
It honestly took me longer to beat Ninja Turtles: Turtles in Time, than it did to have sex with her the first time we met.
I knew as soon as I saw that pole that I was going to wake up the next morning with bruises.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I know I've become a responsible adult because this time, I'm not going to do the drugs I found on the ground
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
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