Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
im so drunk with asians
where?
always
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
this is a reminder to untag myself in the picture of me flashing the photographer in the morning.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
He sent me a vid of himself jerking off. I hope his hands are the size of tennis rackets or it will be a very short date.
Is it socially acceptable to stop at the strip club for the lunch buffet on my way to the airport?
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I fucked her with a giant balloon tied to my dick. You tell ME how my night went
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