We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
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