There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I wouldn't really call it 'getting lucky' considering I paid her to do it.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
It would be magical, all 2 min of it.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
What started out as a one night stand ended in him texting me the next day, saying he thought he was gay.
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Randomize
