I have no voice and feel like lukewarm beer.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
And there I was, sitting Indian style on the kitchen floor, my fingers covered in peanut butter.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
Alright, text me when you get close. I've got a mustache and I'm ready to get my day drunk on.
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
I'm recreating the you're a wizard harry video with a guy on snapchat whilst having snapchat sex with another... Adulting is fun
Help. Why am I so naked?
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