So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
Just drunk tweeted NASA asking them to give me a lift home in one of their spaceships. Fingers crossed
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I never turn down an adventure. My life is like a sexual Lord of the Rings.
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
Be there in 20. Want icecream?
sex. I want sex. I like where your heads at though.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
DO IT!
Randomize
