Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Terrible idea I love it
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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