Kiss
Puke
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
It's amazing how much jurassic park has contributed to my life recently
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
We were having sex but then he spanked me and i punched him but it was just a reflex i swear
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