Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
She put a shot in my mouth and then hit me with a pillow..
Thanks so much for having me, I'm really sorry that I almost caused your dog to catch on fire and also for breaking your doorknob
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
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