you don't know how close you are to someone till they ask you to shave their ass.
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
There r osticjed everywhere
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
That number that I thought was that dude's number...was actually my district manager's number. Fuckkkk.
So baked. About to eat a calzone then hate fuck this guy.
THAT'S MY GIRL
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Randomize
