This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I woke up in a stranger's bathtub with a broken shower curtain as my blanket.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I'm high and dancing to practical magic. Your needs for my penis can wait.
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
The irony of the fact that I'm going to be starting my period on Thanksgiving. Something to truly be thankful for.
Randomize
