Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
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