Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
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