brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I got a blow torch for Christmas. You are now permitted to be afraid.
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
