We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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