bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
