Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
I'm going to make an art book filled with pics of me peeing in every bar bathroom I've ever been in. Dedicating it to you. You're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
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